
Hard-learned leadership lessons from both the military and the corporate world
A leader's reputation is built as much in their absence as their presence. The uncomfortable part? What people say behind closed doors may be more revealing than what they say when we're in the room.
By the time a senior leader walks into a meeting, they are rarely arriving alone. Their previous decisions are already there. So are the promises they kept, and the ones they didn't.
None of this needs to be mentioned. It is already part of the conversation. This is one of the peculiar realities of senior leadership.
The more visible a leader becomes, the less control they have over the version of themselves that enters the room.
People interpret what leaders say through what they already believe about them. And those beliefs have usually been accumulating for considerably longer than the meeting.
Leaders can sometimes approach communication as though every interaction begins from zero.
All useful, but people rarely assess the message independently of the messenger.
Imagine two executives make exactly the same statement: “I want people to challenge this.”
One has a history of changing their mind when presented with better evidence. The other has a history of becoming defensive when challenged. The sentence is identical. The communication is not.
People are not responding only to what was said. They are predicting what is likely to happen next. Reputation is partly that prediction. It is the accumulated answer to the question: “Based on what we have seen before, what is this person likely to do?”
Credibility tends to be discussed as though it were a personal characteristic. Someone either has it or they don't. In reality, much of it is accumulated.
None of these moments necessarily transforms a reputation. But they accumulate.
Eventually people begin extending the leader something valuable: the benefit of the doubt. That matters more than it might appear.
Same decision. Different starting point.
This is why credibility can make leadership considerably easier. It reduces the amount of persuasion required before people are willing to move.
There is a danger here. A strong reputation can protect a leader from the immediate consequences of poor behaviour because people explain things away.
That latitude is valuable. It can also conceal deterioration. Past credibility can allow current behaviour to go unchallenged for longer than it should. Success has similar effects. A leader with a history of good decisions may receive less scrutiny on the next one because confidence becomes associated with competence. Previous judgement becomes evidence for current judgement. Until it isn't.
So, reputation is not merely an asset. It can distort feedback in both directions. A poor reputation can make good leadership harder to recognise. A strong one can make poor leadership harder to confront.
Leaders are frequently told to be consistent. There is good reason for that. People want to understand how decisions are made. They want behavioural boundaries. They want to know that standards will not change depending on who is involved or what mood the leader is in. But consistency is another idea that becomes less useful when taken too far.
A leader who never changes position is not necessarily consistent. They may simply be stubborn. This creates another contradiction.
Credible leaders need to be predictable enough to be trusted and adaptable enough not to become trapped by their own history.
The consistency that matters is often not consistency of decision. It is consistency of principle. People can tolerate a leader changing their mind when they understand why.
What damages credibility is insisting that circumstances have changed when everyone suspects the principle has changed because the outcome is now inconvenient.
At senior levels, another complication appears. Most people in the organisation will have relatively little direct interaction with the leader. Their reputation is therefore built partly through other people's experiences.
Some stories are accurate. Some are missing context, and some become more dramatic in the retelling. That is unavoidable. Leaders do not get to personally fact-check every version of themselves circulating through an organisation. Nor should they try.
Reputation at scale is partly created by behaviour leaders cannot explain afterwards. This makes small interactions disproportionately important. A five-minute conversation that a senior leader barely remembers may become the story another person talks about them for years. Not because senior leaders should perform every interaction for an imagined audience. Because power makes encounters memorable in ways it does not always make them memorable for the person holding it.
It is relatively easy to lead when events support the narrative.
Reputation becomes more consequential when circumstances deteriorate.
Now the organisation begins drawing on its accumulated experience of the leader.
These moments often build more credibility than success does. Not because failure is desirable but because pressure reveals information that ordinary conditions conceal.
It is relatively easy to demonstrate values when values are inexpensive. People pay more attention when they cost something.
When trust deteriorates, organisations often reach for communication.
Sometimes that helps. But a behavioural problem cannot always be repaired with a communication solution.
This is uncomfortable because communication can be changed quickly. Reputation usually cannot. It has to be contradicted by enough new evidence for people to revise what they think they know. That takes time.
Leaders cannot communicate themselves out of a reputation their behaviour keeps confirming.
There is one final complication. Organisational reputations are not always fair.
Once a narrative becomes established, contradictory behaviour may be interpreted through it rather than allowed to challenge it. Senior leaders have to accept some of this.
They should correct significant inaccuracies where it matters but they should not spend their careers chasing every interpretation. Trying to control reputation too aggressively creates its own reputational problem.
There is a difference between caring about credibility and needing to be liked.
Senior leaders cannot start again in every meeting. That is both the advantage and the burden of reputation. Years of credible behaviour can create trust before a leader has said a word and years of inconsistency can create doubt just as quickly.
Neither means the room is necessarily right. But pretending the history isn't there does not make it disappear.
Instead of asking, “How do I want people to perceive me?”
Ask, “Given what people have repeatedly seen from me, what would it be reasonable for them to expect?”
That question is harder to answer with a communications strategy. Which is probably why it is worth asking. Because by the time a senior leader enters the room, their reputation has already introduced them.
The higher we lead, the fewer easy answers we get.
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Drawn from lessons learned in the military, and in business, we make leadership principles tangible and relatable through real-world examples, personal anecdotes, and case studies.
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